Paying the piper

Last night, Mom and I sat on the deck and chatted. She keeps asking me about the Assisted Living places that we've toured. She wants details. She wants to be kept informed. She wants to know about the place that she will eventually call home. I completely understand, but I'm not really ready to share all of the details because I haven't yet found the perfect place. Honestly, I don't know if the perfect place exists. I pray it does, but I'm losing hope.

Actually, the perfect place does exist, but we can't afford it. Sigh.

When I tell her about the place we want them to live, I want to be excited about it. I want to paint a pretty picture filled with happiness and love. Here's what you need to know about me: I'm a terrible liar. I don't know that I can sell my parents on a place that I don't entirely love. If I feel like they're unhappy, will I ever be able to be happy?

How did we get to this perfect storm of awfulness? I'll tell you how - poor financial decisions. Along the way, choices were made and now, here we are in 2012, making living arrangements based on the poor choices. I'm not assigning blame, I'm simply telling a cautionary tale: Be prudent. Be frugal. Seek advice.

Mom was starting to see that last night and I could tell she was angry. She and I talked about the past and how they got to where they are now. She was venting a bit about money that was spent, perhaps foolishly. She has been Dad's staunchest ally for nearly 60 years. She stood by him through some pretty rough waters. Now, when they are both in a fragile state, we might be headed for a tsunami.

Our choices are few and far between and turning back the clock is not one of them.